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Pathos - A little less than a happy high
komos
komos
Pathos
In order to save myself a great deal of sturm and angst over nothing, I'm thinking about giving up my habit of assuming that I've done [something] horribly, horribly wrong and that [someone] is upset with me. I need to speak about it in general terms because even though I manage to work myself up over very specific events, there's usually something like this working at the back of my mind on an almost constant basis.

Basically, if I care about you, I have at some point or another thought that I upset you with something I have said or done, or perhaps with something I failed to say or do. Such is the manifestation of my pathos. I often feel the need to apologize for things that probably have no life outside of my own self-recriminations, and I really need to get out of the habit of using friends as unwitting mirrors of my insecurity.

I'm going to try not being quite so hyper-aware of my "negative" effects in your lives. I don't anticipate that I'll change much outside of my perception, but in order to make this work, I've got to ask a favor... In the event that I do upset you, please just let me know. Be honest. I can take it.
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Comments
canonfire From: canonfire Date: December 2nd, 2004 02:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm so pissed at you! I can't get the tasty beer you made ANYWHERE!
komos From: komos Date: December 2nd, 2004 03:02 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh man, I knew it. Now I'll have to start brewing again to satisfy your appreciative palate.

Heh.
wisdom_seeker From: wisdom_seeker Date: December 2nd, 2004 02:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
Just because: *hug*
komos From: komos Date: December 2nd, 2004 03:02 pm (UTC) (Link)
Have a cookie?
wisdom_seeker From: wisdom_seeker Date: December 2nd, 2004 03:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
cookie? No. Cheese

BTW, thanks for the foodstuffs that you packed for my trip home. When I got stuck on the highway on the drive back from the airport, I was so thankful for that cheese!
komos From: komos Date: December 2nd, 2004 03:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
No cheese?
wisdom_seeker From: wisdom_seeker Date: December 6th, 2004 07:13 am (UTC) (Link)
No period Cheese... ;-p

Cheese = good

i heard later that evening that it was national cookie day, so I guess cookie would have been good, too...
komos From: komos Date: December 6th, 2004 12:35 pm (UTC) (Link)
No period cheese? Okay, I'll stop.

You should have had the cookie though. Then your density destiny would have been complete.
clayrobeson From: clayrobeson Date: December 2nd, 2004 03:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
If you ever upset me, I will surely let you know post haste so you don't have to worry. :)
komos From: komos Date: December 2nd, 2004 03:17 pm (UTC) (Link)
Sweet.

Oh, and hey... thanks for the amazon drop. I was confused momentarily (A box? For me? How strange!), but it really did make my day.
From: ex_cayetana730 Date: December 2nd, 2004 03:16 pm (UTC) (Link)
A lot of us have the same pathos :)
komos From: komos Date: December 2nd, 2004 03:23 pm (UTC) (Link)
I think the fear that there isn't a place for you is just part of being human. You can get so caught up in that fear that you can make yourself crazy. (I know I do...)
From: ex_cayetana730 Date: December 2nd, 2004 03:24 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh definitely. It's frustrating to know why you are thinking crazy things, but not be able to make your brain stop.
komos From: komos Date: December 2nd, 2004 07:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'd just like to get to the point where it's not crippling. I know I'm not going to rid myself of the impulse, but I'm pretty sure I can trust you all to be straight up with me. It's a start, and I think a good one.
cosmicserpent From: cosmicserpent Date: December 2nd, 2004 04:51 pm (UTC) (Link)
You've never upset me once, but I do keep meaning to ask you something so I'll do so here: Do you still have that book on photography I loaned you a while back? :P
komos From: komos Date: December 2nd, 2004 08:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
I do. I cherish it. It's my PRECIOUS.

Or, more seriously... I can get it back to you at any time. I'll grab it next time I plan to see you.
laughingwoman From: laughingwoman Date: December 2nd, 2004 05:09 pm (UTC) (Link)
Basically, if I care about you, I have at some point or another thought that I upset you with something I have said or done, or perhaps with something I failed to say or do.

we manifest similarily. and even though i'm new to you, i understand this. be well.
komos From: komos Date: December 2nd, 2004 08:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
Well, at least the voices aren't only in my head.

Thanks. ^_^
mudguts From: mudguts Date: December 3rd, 2004 05:40 am (UTC) (Link)

Such is the manifestation of my pathos.

as i expressed to you recently, my particular pathos comes in sudden paranoid feelings that people can read my mind. always, of course, following negative thoughts i have toward the individual.
i attempt to believe this is irrational but mind powers are one of those things impossible to disprove.

as evidence, behold my mad precognitive skills...
when heading inbound last night, i was filled with the notion we would pass by on our commute.
so maybe i wasnt suprised, but no less delighted, to enjoy the pleasure of your company on the ride home.

perhaps, if we could accept the fact that we are gods and took reign of our abilities, their manifestation would become evident.

uhmmm, yea.
komos From: komos Date: December 3rd, 2004 12:25 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Such is the manifestation of my pathos.

You're prescient, too?

And why is this? Because he is the kwisatz haderach!
From: corvus_coronis Date: December 3rd, 2004 06:24 am (UTC) (Link)
My father had a dog who was something like that, he was always getting into trouble for things he wasnt involved in because he would act like he expected & deserved it. He was also the best working dog my father ever owned, just another small example of how attitude & reality can come away from each other *nods in your direction*
komos From: komos Date: December 3rd, 2004 12:27 pm (UTC) (Link)
Reality is 90% perception and about 10% concensus (and even that's malleable sometimes...)
teddywookie From: teddywookie Date: December 6th, 2004 11:45 am (UTC) (Link)
I've never really analyzed why I assume the worst when it comes to other people's opinions of me. This habit of worrying about how an action or conversation is perceived fails the reversal test miserably; whenever I consider what my own reaction might be, I can't imagine taking offense. Maybe I tend to like the people I'm talking to, maybe any combination of neuroses. It's heartening to know that while my thinking is skewed, there are at the least people in the same ball park.

Plus, Torta Mil Ovejas is a great name for a cheese. I didn't think that a cheese could make me laugh - picture it, "Hey Maw, could ya pass down the Cake of a Thousand Sheep?"

Do you mind if I add you to my friends list?
komos From: komos Date: December 6th, 2004 12:34 pm (UTC) (Link)
Cheese often makes me laugh, but I've got an odd sense of humor. Still, Cake of A Thousand Sheep is pretty priceless.

And not at all. If you're willing to put up with my neurotic ramblings, you're more than welcome. ^_^
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