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It's the smiling on the package - A little less than a happy high
komos
komos
It's the smiling on the package
I had a bit of a crisis of faith last night. It spawned from feeling overwhelmed at work and was fed by cascading regrets over bad choices that have led to a rather untenable situation. It's how I felt last night, anyway. I'm much more chipper today. I'm still not entirely convinced that I haven't managed to fuck most everything up, but that's been tempered by a sense of the flow of things. For all of my outward trappings of mediocrity and ordinariness (?), there's been, of late at least, an undercurrent of something other I've been playing with. E- and I often spoke of the adage, "It's easy to be enlightened on a mountain" as a way of communicating the weird appeal of the extreme as a means of manifesting remarkable things in one's life, and how it may be much more rewarding, ultimately, to find ways to bring the mountain with you.

I have no idea how well this is communicating. Suffice to say that I still wish I were young, beautiful and fabulous, but sometimes a simple email from a friend is better still.

Completely off-topic, I've (non-work) things I need to take care of before driving to The Maine tomorrow:

- Contemplate financial matters (If only long enough to have a plan for the month)
- Buy brown shoes (Passable, but a little boring)
- Do laundry
- Pick up dry cleaning
- Pick up second tux vest since first was "billowy"
- Get haircut
- Transport cat to V's place
- Transport dogs to temporary digs
- Clean fur from the interior of the car
- Drop off Eric's greel and accoutrements
- Rack wheat to secondary
- Consider prepping apples for final conditioning of the wheat (Long enough to realize it could wait)
- Get in touch with folks about Tuesday's filmrounds
- Discuss plans for weekend and beyond with my passengers and houseguests

(If you can think of anything else, let me know.)
22 comments or Leave a comment
Comments
cinemama From: cinemama Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:02 pm (UTC) (Link)
Peter, come down and visit!! We'll have ginger martinis and cheese, and shoot the shit. I know exactly of what you speak.
komos From: komos Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:32 pm (UTC) (Link)
Tuesday is being driven by a plan of Clay's that will make for a very full and somewhat long night. If we can work it, I should be down for the doings. I'm sure he'll have more details when he's done napping.

I'd love to do a proper visit, though. I'll bring pie. ^_^

I figured you might.
cosmicserpent From: cosmicserpent Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:16 pm (UTC) (Link)
That greel can stay there until Sunday unless there is no room in the trunk!
komos From: komos Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:25 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm already wondering where we're going to fit our clothes, so it's probably worth the time to swing by your place to drop it off... unless, of course, you've got some crazy plan to use it at the hotel. In that case, we'll make it work.

As I said, though, I need to go back to Mr. Tux, so if you want to come with, that's cool.
cosmicserpent From: cosmicserpent Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:28 pm (UTC) (Link)
I was going to go after work tonight. I'm sending you an e-mail now.

I wish we could grill at the hotel. That would probably be a bit of a hassle. DAMN THE MAN FOR KILLING MY SAUSAGE MAKING ABILITY.
From: ex_cayetana730 Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:19 pm (UTC) (Link)
I emailed Sam, but any time tonight for the ahem "drop off" is fine :)
komos From: komos Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:29 pm (UTC) (Link)
Want to try the Scottish light?
From: ex_cayetana730 Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:36 pm (UTC) (Link)
What?
komos From: komos Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:47 pm (UTC) (Link)
It's a recent brew that's ready. Be happy to bring some by.
From: ex_cayetana730 Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:49 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh! I thought it was something like that :)
Yes please!
sassyinkpen From: sassyinkpen Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:23 pm (UTC) (Link)
Well, I don't know if I'm getting it right, but what I got as I read that is..."It's easy to be enlightened on a mountain..."

But try doing it when you've had to work late the last two nights in a row and are only facing more, have a slew of hideously boring soccer games in front of you, and your shirt doesn't fit right. When you can tackle the day to day mechanics of life with grace, and maintain your preferred outlook on life...or better yet, find a certain satisfaction in all those things...then you've got it all figured out.



komos From: komos Date: June 2nd, 2005 02:43 pm (UTC) (Link)

Some days are better than others

I'm blissfully safe from the soccer games, but I'm right with you on all the rest. ^_^
kochanie From: kochanie Date: June 2nd, 2005 03:09 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Some days are better than others

hmm, i didn't quite understand the mountain bit, and am curious... there is coming down off the mountain too, which is difficult...maybe what you mean?...as they say silence in silence is easy... and just so you know, even though i am moving around quite a bit, it is trying and makes me wonder and it sounds oh so nice, but is really no different than being here or there. its not like traveling for pleasure and sight see, its just staying in one place and work and practice etc. -- if you were interested.
komos From: komos Date: June 2nd, 2005 03:28 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Some days are better than others

There's a part of me that desperately wishes that I had made the choices that would have led to elaborate experiences in far off places, but I know that somehow, the same fears and reservations I have now would have traveled with me. On some level, making noodles in Hong Kong and pushing paper in Boston are precisely the same. The corollary to this is that there is adventure to be had within the context of what may appear to be utterly ordinary. Enlightenment off the mountain; the remarkable within the mundane.

I'm still not explaining this well, but hopefully it's a start.
clayrobeson From: clayrobeson Date: June 2nd, 2005 03:53 pm (UTC) (Link)
I have no idea how well this is communicating. Suffice to say that I still wish I were young, beautiful and fabulous, but sometimes a simple email from a friend is better still.

You are most certainly NOT old. You're definately fetching. And in MY book (which is, of course, the ONLY book that counts) you're fabulous beyond belief.

Just because you can't tag "twenty-something" on there is no reason to be sad. Just flex your butt cheeks and shout "I WIN!" at the sky. :)
komos From: komos Date: June 2nd, 2005 04:17 pm (UTC) (Link)

Danke ^_^

Old? No, probably not. I will lay claim to the "seasoned" moniker, however. Perhaps even "salty."

Like I said, some days are better than others. I have moments when I wonder what the point of any of it is, and those are dark, dark times. 'Course sometimes the simplest thing can pull me out of that spiral.

When are you getting that whole Emperor gig?
From: corvus_coronis Date: June 2nd, 2005 05:18 pm (UTC) (Link)
"It's easy to be nelightened on a mountain" - I like that quote.
From: corvus_coronis Date: June 2nd, 2005 05:19 pm (UTC) (Link)
correction: enlightened
komos From: komos Date: June 2nd, 2005 05:37 pm (UTC) (Link)
I like llamas.
why_style From: why_style Date: June 2nd, 2005 06:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
i've heard that quote about the mountain somewhere before. i always read it as meaning that it is easier to find something when you're in the "proper" space for it (i.e. the mountaintop being the traditional place a monk would go in search of enlightenment because of the solitude provided there). the real challenge is finding that same thing in an environment not suited to it (like finding enlightenment in the hustle and bustle of everyday life already full of errands, soccer matches, and feeding oneself). i usually broaden it to include other things as well, and i really like your interpretation of extremes.
komos From: komos Date: June 2nd, 2005 08:04 pm (UTC) (Link)

Will my analogies ever end??

Extreme can be tiring. Take the beer world, for instance. American beermakers are all into the extreme thing because somewhere in there, they get to claim the superlative of some area. But once everything is hopped up beyond your capability of discerning more bitterness or aged in oak or "Imperial"-ized, there's really just a lot of noise over marginally drinkable products.

It's far more impressive to have a beermaker present a well-balanced product that is distinctive on its own merits. I think this is more akin to what I'm going for.
why_style From: why_style Date: June 2nd, 2005 08:51 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Will my analogies ever end??

too, too true. i applaud such an endeavor. you're right that often the extreme-just-for-extreme's-sake approach can be misleading. in a way it really defeats the purpose. i mean, why bother being enlightened if you're just going to sit on a mountain top by yourself? if you can't share your enlightenment and help others to reach it, or at the very least demonstrate your enlightenment to a witness, does it matter? the proverbial, tree in the woods thing i guess. if a beer has so many hops that you can't taste anything else, is it still a beer? it's like with spicy food- i love it, but some people think it's all about heat and a test of manhood or something instead of flavor. but what i like about your interpretation of the mountain as the extreme is exactly that. it's about how out of whack with reality the mountain is. sure it's easy to be at peace when nothing's around to bother you, but i'd rather be at peace in spite of the world dumping crap on me all the time. so i don't so much want to take the mountain with me as learn to live without the mountain, accept the trials of existence, and find a way to deal with them.
22 comments or Leave a comment