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Limited offer - A little less than a happy high
komos
komos
Limited offer
If you're thinking about seeing Cloverfield, I have a deal for you and it will save you fully 50% of the ticket price. For $5.00, I will come to your house, pop a copy of The Blair Witch Project in your dvd player, and then alternately punch you in the gut and shake your head violently for an hour and a half.

Any proceeds will be used to fund my expedition to track down J.J. Abrams for the express purpose of clubbing him repeatedly with a cricket bat.

Yeah, it's that bad. Here's the big ending spoiler - there's a girl with snot running out of her nose whining about being 'so scared.' This film is rated FW for Feckin' Weak.
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Comments
c_m_i From: c_m_i Date: January 19th, 2008 04:34 am (UTC) (Link)
See, all we did was get shitfaced at JJ Foley's.
komos From: komos Date: January 19th, 2008 12:55 pm (UTC) (Link)
You missed me laughing out loud when the dude who had spent the film swinging the camera around wildly got eaten. That was awesome, and he had it coming.
wanderyng1 From: wanderyng1 Date: January 19th, 2008 05:14 am (UTC) (Link)
Well shit...and I was really looking forward to that one too :-p

Ah well, I guess I'll have to get you to swing by and beat the shit out of me so I don't feel like I missed out.
komos From: komos Date: January 19th, 2008 12:53 pm (UTC) (Link)
Some people seemed to really like it. I tend to think that the "aggressively hand-held" technique is cheap, and I can point to a half dozen points in the film where the camera would have been irretrievably lost. When we got to the girl with snot running down her nose scene, I relegated the film to a BW rip-off in an urban setting.
schizohedron From: schizohedron Date: January 19th, 2008 04:13 pm (UTC) (Link)
Four of us went to Blair Witch in the theater. Two made it through. Two of us, including myself, had to leave halfway through with motion sickness due to the UnSteadiCam. I despise this form of camera work. Hell, I also hate the strobe-o-cam used in the fight scenes in Gladiator, and they are the reason I have not seen that film on home video.

I feel vindicated. My cover = book prejudice w/r/t movie trailers is vicious, but seems like I was right on with Cloverfield. Would you believe I haven't seen a premiere since Snakes on a Plane? With the exceptions of No Country for Old Men and There Will Be Blood, nothing has looked worth either my money or dealing with current audiences. (By contrast, the audience for Snakes was almost as pumped as the ones with which I first saw Robocop; they knew exactly what they were there for.) Closest I've come to a theater since then was a documentary about Helvetica, which I missed due to limited release. And before that, a documentary about Klaus Nomi.

That's right, Hollywood, I'd rather see a film about a goddamn typeface or a gnomish German countertenor than any of the shit you're shoveling onto America's screens. You are ON NOTICE!
komos From: komos Date: January 20th, 2008 01:35 am (UTC) (Link)
I haven't mocked a film so openly since 300.
starboogie From: starboogie Date: January 22nd, 2008 07:31 pm (UTC) (Link)
I hope you've already bought tickets to Helvetica. Shows are selling out worldwide!
faux_eonix From: faux_eonix Date: January 19th, 2008 04:29 pm (UTC) (Link)
My feeling is, if you insist on watching the film, and frankly, I don't know why you would, take some dramamine, it will help.
komos From: komos Date: January 20th, 2008 01:33 am (UTC) (Link)
You're not supposed to get motion sick sitting still!
tarotchan From: tarotchan Date: January 19th, 2008 05:46 pm (UTC) (Link)
*can't stop laughing*
komos From: komos Date: January 20th, 2008 01:34 am (UTC) (Link)
You have already derived more enjoyment from this film than I have.
tarotchan From: tarotchan Date: January 20th, 2008 10:39 pm (UTC) (Link)
Fabulous!
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