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Bugger - A little less than a happy high — LiveJournal
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From: skygoodwill Date: June 27th, 2004 11:40 am (UTC) (Link)
Its about choice. Its about knowing who you are. Its about knowing how things affect you on varying levels. Its knowing what crushes you and what doesn't. Its knowing what 'engages' you and fills you with love and light that builds and helps you grow.

But I mean, if you like the crushing... If you like being destroyed, it will take time to recover to do other things.

Its about choice. And knowing what the hell is going on.

The heart always knows. Its the mind that has a vested interest in the re-traumatizing. Varying reasons... but a most compelling one is that when one has gone through enormous challenges, in that moment in time, we grab onto what ever we see around us, and whatever is left within us and we pull ourselves up. Dastardly, sometimes, the very thing we grab hold of is the one that pushed us down in the first place - and now with the honoured place as the - "most loyal" and the "was always there" - will forever get the wonderous opportunity to do the pushing one down over and over and over and over again. Its about choice, making decisions based on one's thriving and success - not on one's survival. As soon as you find you are doing something based on what someone did for you in the past and it doesn't feel good to do it, know you are being taken advantaged of on a deep psychological level. But then again, you let them.

Its about choice. And what does it have to do with getting things done that you want to do - yes all the things that are healthy for you? - ENERGY.

Negative energy drains you. Interacting with it drains you. Doing something with negative energy drains you, those around you, and what you are doing cannot sustain itself UNLESS you do what most negative energy people do... live off other people's positive energy to sustain their lives.

Positive energy is how everything gets done and sustains.

Advice: WAKE UP and makes changes asap. The walking zombie thing is not working for you. You are alive, you made it... so for Christs Sakes, live intelligently if you can't do it lovingly.
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