Kid just loves him some cows (komos) wrote,
Kid just loves him some cows

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In honor of the lies people tell themselves

I am the Wandering Jew, and if you question me with the likes of, "But you're not Jewish..." I promise I'll put out both your eyes with two shards of the One True Cross that I won from an Irish Gypsy in a fiddle contest.

I have also now bedded most of the surviving Romanovs. Thanks to their remarkable devotion to certain secret Tantric rites, they're still spry and terribly willing. Tatiana was so happy with our encounter, she introduced me to a sect of Tibetan assassins who taught me Dim Mak, the mysterious death touch of the east.

Oh... and I'm a vampire.

Did I miss anything?
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