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A little less than a happy high
komos
komos
"Hey, who's the hobo here?"
If I were a superstitious sort (and I'm not... in spite of my reluctance to get a grocery store card and let them track what I EAT), I'd swear that anxiety is your psyche's way of telling you to get off your arse and do something because long-term depression is just too boring. It's a pity that it's as debilitating and a damned sight more scary.

In case you're wondering, I had another panic attack earlier this evening. I did manage to stave it off (mostly) by hauling myself out of the house to do laundry and have dinner. I ate too much and wish I had accomplished more, but there you have it.

On the upside, I'm very tired, and getting to sleep will be little problem.

Current Mood: calmer now
Current Music: Danny Elfman, "Theme to The Simpsons"

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Comments
guitarcries From: guitarcries Date: April 30th, 2002 09:12 pm (UTC) (Link)

I dated a guy who had panic attacks. At first I didn't even know what they were; we would be getting ready to go out somewhere and he would sit down in a chair and become unresponsive, make up weird excuses for why he didn't want to go out, stall, etc... it was actually really scary. And then it would pass and we'd be out the door in seconds.

Sounds like it's a lot more scary to be the one experiencing them, though... I hope you're feeling better.
komos From: komos Date: May 1st, 2002 06:55 am (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, I'm fortunate in that a) it's still a relatively novel experience and b) I don't (think I) have full blown anxiety and so the sensation usually passes pretty quickly. I've had a couple of rough afternoons, but that's about it.

I think the scariest thing for me is that I feel like I have to concentrate in order to keep breathing. I have a weird hangup about being able to breathe anyway, so it creates a pretty impressive feedback loop.

But yes, thanks. Much better now.
khourytamarisk From: khourytamarisk Date: May 1st, 2002 07:08 am (UTC) (Link)

Guess what?

Exactly the same as my S.O.

Do you get claustrophobia or have problems in cars or anything like that?
komos From: komos Date: May 1st, 2002 07:33 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: Guess what?

The only problem I've had in cars has been trusting in the driver's ability when I'm a passenger, though that has more to do with my mom nearly getting me killed twice with her "slam on brakes/spin wheel" technique used to avoid hitting pheasants crossing the road. (Strangely, it never worked...)

Claustrophobia is kind of an off and on thing. Mostly, it doesn't bug me, but then I've never been able to get myself to go caving. :)
khourytamarisk From: khourytamarisk Date: May 1st, 2002 05:26 am (UTC) (Link)

You should talk...

...to my boyfriend. He's been having panic attacks for over a year now. They've gotten better in the past 3 months, but they still come back from time to time.
komos From: komos Date: May 1st, 2002 06:58 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: You should talk...

You know, I never would have guessed that. Even though he often seems pretty random, there is a certain centered-ness about him.

Who'da thunk?
khourytamarisk From: khourytamarisk Date: May 1st, 2002 07:12 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: You should talk...

That's why he always has water or some other non caffeinated drink with him, and why he rubs the area over his heart. It helps stave off the worst of the attacks & etc. It makes him feel like he can breathe easier. He likes to be constantly stimulated by conversation & the like when he's having one, as his attacks are combined with extreme nervous energy. He cleaned the entire apartment once because of one.

I wish I could get him on my insurance. He needs to see a psychologist or something. It'd help him with his insomnia, too.
komos From: komos Date: May 1st, 2002 07:37 am (UTC) (Link)
Meditative breathing techniques seem to do the trick for me. It would be better not to have them at all, but if I can center and stave off the worst of it, I'm set.

Yoga... you seek Yoga. ;)
From: uruz Date: May 1st, 2002 09:57 am (UTC) (Link)
I don't know if I've ever shared this with anyone, but some time last year, when I was still living over at Glenville, I would be getting anxiety attacks in the morning. I would just start gagging, in the shower, for no reason. This wave of nausea would hold me in its icy grip for up to twenty minutes, and this was before I even ate anything. It came, and went, and I was able to go on with my morning routine.

But it was very frightening. That was a point in my life where I worried about life and death and taxes and making the best of myself, every conscious second. I was still getting over my breakup with Kelly, and questioning my self worth.

Now, it's all good. I don't think I've had any anxiety lately, except when I was first reallyreally sick with my gallstones. But even that doesn't bother me anymore.
komos From: komos Date: May 1st, 2002 10:52 am (UTC) (Link)
I guess that it's not that uncommon an experience. It sucks, though, and my heart goes out to anyone I know who's gone through it. We'll see if a week away helps any.
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