Kid just loves him some cows (komos) wrote,
Kid just loves him some cows

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Street Shaman

Saturday night, Paul fell into what I can only describe as a kind of weird shamanistic state. Apparently, it started because he had seen a skunk outside of muzzie’s apartment just before we left to head back to the northern parts of the city. As we headed towards the highway, he shared that he had only ever seen skunks when he was in something of an altered state. The sightings he had in the past, he related, happened most often after he had dropped acid. Saturday, the substance of choice was significantly more mundane, but enough to inspire his sharing a recurring dream he’s had about the corruption of his spirit. Based on the details of the dream, it’s unclear if he thinks the ill-humor stems from external sources or if it is some aspect of his self that is sullying him.

He asked if I had ever had a dream like it, and I told him about my encounter with the divine. I also remembered a piece of that dream that I didn’t share with you here. Shortly after I fell to weeping, I looked up to find that Shiva was no longer physically manifested in front of me. I found myself on one knee, dressed in the livery of an officer of Napoleon’s army, and tasked with leading my troops against Wellington in order to appease Shiva. I lost. In the weeks that followed, this part of the dream replayed itself. I attempted new tactics, changed troop placement, and otherwise did everything in my power to win the battle, to no avail. I failed, and with each failure I felt myself falling further from my task. Side Note: I also remember sharing this dream with Mary Tess years ago. She pointed out that pleasing Shiva was a near-impossible task. That certainly played out.

I’ve read that Shiva and Kali are often symbolic of the need to live your earthly existence to its fullest. I’ve been a long way off from that. It is curious to me how this is all coming back now. Timing? Body memory? I don’t know...

Paul acted as advisor and council while we were talking about all of this. His priest-like state was weird enough to be unnerving.

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