Kid just loves him some cows (komos) wrote,
Kid just loves him some cows
komos

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Overwhelmed

My world just keeps getting stranger. I came into the office this morning to find an email entitled "Bioterrorism." The post was a summons from my überboss to attend a lecture on the state of preparedness of MA hospitals and emergency services for a bioterrorist attack. Though I’ll confess that I am interested, the topic has very little to do with my actual role. My inner cynic has me thinking that there is a desire for a redundant knowledge base in the event that theory becomes reality.

Yeah, it’s a little unnerving.

So, Peter, you know you have to answer the obvious question: where've you been?

Honestly, I don't really remember. Ok, that's not entirely true. I remember being really angry at the dishonesty of management at my office. Rather than do proper layoffs, instead the staff has been placed on "double secret probation" in an effort to ferret out waste and inefficiency (i.e. to find people to fire.)

In the face of the crackdown, I've been unable to write at work, and I've been coming home so brain dead that I can't bear the thought of sitting down in front of the computer. At first, I really wanted to write. I had things to say that probably weren't important in the grand scheme of things, but were relevant to me, at least when I first thought of them. Then, everything started going grey.

See, deprived of the outlet I've allowed myself for the better part of the past year, I fell into a another depression. To make matters worse, I started feeling increasingly isolated and out of touch. I've really started to love all of you here, and not being able to correspond with you regularly started to take its toll.

There was something else, too, but you'll have to wait for "Hero Boy, what have you learned, part 3" to hear about that.

I was overwhelmed, and I needed to adjust to the change.

I made time to write a little tonight, and will do so more regularly. I have answers to your posts and questions from weeks ago. Some I'll get to soon. Others may no longer be relevant, but I have been thinking of you all and reading you whenever I could.

Suffice to say, I've missed you. Another testament to the weirdness that is lj.
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