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A little less than a happy high
It Ain't Apache Country
My dreams of late have all been of the ‘shit or get off the pot’ variety. Sadly though, I’ve gone from the relatively benign "wake up and realize that it’s the end of a semester in which I’ve done no work" dream into something far more sinister. The latest have involved my actively making bad choices that can only end in disaster, so more like the "ooo... that’s gonna leave a mark" variety.

You think I would have gotten the hint after the "You have angered the gods" dream.

At any rate, I had two of these this weekend, but thanks to the glorious powers of selective memory, I’ve managed to forget the more gruesome of the pair. In the one I do remember, S and I are embarking on a hike in the White Mountains (NH, not AZ) and I am woefully under-equipped. Instead of my normal gear, I’m wearing a wool overcoat and have some small amount of food stashed in my messenger bag. For some reason, I find the overcoat too bulky and restricting, and we stop off at a restaurant/hostel along the path so I can stash it. When we get there, it’s getting dark and a light snow is falling.

After some soup and a couple of conversations, we head out again, this time with a group of inexperienced teenagers who have decided to come along to benefit from my ‘expertise.’ We walk in the dark, crushing snow beneath our boots and bundling our heads against the snow that’s falling heavier now, and I state outright that if the weather gets any worse (?!), we will have to turn back. I’m asked why and I start sharing what I’ve picked up over the years. The Whites are considered some of the most dangerous mountains in the world because the weather patterns are so unpredictable. Every mountain and valley somehow generates its own microclimate and the variation can have you crest a sunny ridge in high summer only to find yourself trapped in a blizzard. Every year has another tragic story that begins "We were hiking the White Mountains in the winter and..."

These are all things I know, and still I pressed on into a rising storm. We reached the first ridge (I think we were coming out of Crawford Notch), and ran into a party coming down the trail who spoke of worsening conditions approaching Mt. Washington. Instead of saying that we should turn around right then, I suggested that we forego the ~10 mi. hike to Washington and try to summit one of the lesser peaks that lie along this western spur. Everyone in the other party laughed and then proceeded to head downward to safety. All eyes in my group turned to me, and I stood paralyzed, transfixed by a farmhouse in an impossible location I saw in the distance.

Current Mood: sleepy sleepy
Current Music: Nine Inch Nails, "The Wretched"

4 comments or Leave a comment
riverbank From: riverbank Date: November 26th, 2002 09:57 am (UTC) (Link)
i love reading dreams, they're such a mingling of distorted thoughts. funny how in dreams we 'have it in for ourselves', causing our own axiety. making obviously bad decisions turning our dream situations worse. i've kept a dream diary for two years, most of them seeming sinister also.
komos From: komos Date: November 30th, 2002 01:12 pm (UTC) (Link)
Sadly, most of the dreams I've been remembering lately have all been at least a little disturbing. I used to be a lot better about recording them, but dropped off a bit in the past few years.

I was talking with S- about the dream, and at every step she said, "But you just wouldn't do that!" I get downright self-destructive in my dreams, and I know that that has a great deal to do with my being such in waking life... It's much quieter, but it's been a long time since I've listened to the voice that can actually guide my steps.
hieeee From: hieeee Date: November 26th, 2002 10:14 am (UTC) (Link)

bleh . . . oh, and hello! :)

:: is still waiting for applie pie recipe ::

Yeah. You've forgotten all about me, haven't you, Peter? :: frowns :: Well, I suppose that's understandable. I haven't been posting as-of-late. narf.

Dreams are amazing, aren't they? I sometimes think that maybe, if I would spend more time sleeping, my thoughts would come to me more fluidly and maybe I would understand my life a little better. Go figure. I can't comprehend my own waking thoughts.

How've you been? Good, I hope. Have a great Thanksgiving and be safe, ko?

komos From: komos Date: November 30th, 2002 01:09 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: bleh . . . oh, and hello! :)

I've not forgotten, and I haven't forgotten you either. In the first case, badgering my family for our recipe has garnered only a copy of the Apple Pie recipe that Marjorie Standish published in Cooking Downeast. I thought it would be a little more profound than that, but I am more than happy to post that to you along witha couple of things I've learned along the way.

As for the latter, your posting has been no more spotty than mine, so I'm certainly not going to be the one to fault you. I wish I had more time here.

T-day was fine, though I still wish I could have had a gathering at my place instead of going to witness the family rituals. Thanks for the bolster... Hope you're well, too.

4 comments or Leave a comment